In an unprecedented last minute executive order, President Trump declared Thanksgiving as the newly rebranded national holiday, “Trumpsgiving”, according to anonymous high-level sources close to the administration.
The presidential name change took place early this morning, moments before the kickoff of the Macy’s Thanksgiving’s Day Parade. In response many cheered at the news, as others publicly screamed at the sky in agony.
Reports close to the unnamed sources Thursday, described the new holiday as similar to Thanksgiving but tremendously and hugely and bigly better for all Americans everywhere, a great success, like no other. And that people will love it, you’ll see.
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Posted in Comedy, Fake News, media, USA
Tagged America, Fake News, Holiday, Love, News, President, seasons greetings, Thanksgiving, Trump, Trumpsgiving, USA
It’s a fact that Minnesota has the 5th highest tax burden in America, yet we could have the highest tax burden in the country if we elect more Democrats. We could be number one. I believe that is what we must do. That is why I believe we must vote for Tim Walz, because a vote for Tim Walz is a vote for higher necessary taxes.
Remember the above stated fact whilst placing your votes in November. We are not the highest taxed state in our country: four other states outdo us in paying higher taxes. We must show our country that we can and will pay more in taxes for what is right. Tim Walz is absolutely the candidate to make it happen, he already proposed adding a gas tax to Minnesotan’s taxes, and many other tax hikes. To do better we need to vote for Tim Walz who will raise our taxes greatly, regardless.
In conclusion, we must pay higher taxes to make Minnesota the highest taxed state in America. Big government has a “buy now” price, Tim Walz is ready and willing with our pocketbooks. Let’s not wait. We must keep Minnesota progressive no matter the heavy cost. That is why, in November, I am willing to pay my fair share with higher taxes imposed by Tim Walz and the Democrats. I am willing to look good and pay more by voting for the Democratic party exclusively. I hope you consider this option and do that same.
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Posted in Debt, Fake News, marketing, motivation, Politics
Tagged Democrats, dnc, Election, Minnesota, Politics, taxes, Tim Walz, USA
After being put on injured reserve (IR) last season, Aaron Rodgers tenure with the Packers was put in limbo. Now, after appearing in numerous State Farm commercials Rodgers’ fate with the Green Bay Packers is rumored to be incredibly uncertain at best and at worst not impacted at all.
This potential bombshell of an assumption will come as a shock and surprise to die-hard Cheeseheads across some very small portions of the country. This fake news is downright unbelievable, unaccountable, and lacking any credibility whatsoever. This article is pure satire, but no one will read this far into it because: modern times/no one reads.
Rodgers was contacted in the future for a prophetic statement but could not answer because he was not actually contacted in the future for a statement because this article is only satire, and every just assumes the headlines are “facts”.
Amid swirling rumors and speculation and video evidence, in the form of a State Farm commercial, Rodgers solidified his trade to State Farm potentially–possibly signalling that he will be leaving for another team, or maybe he won’t. But there is video proof in the form of a video to prove this narrative.
The Green Bay Packers will never be the same successful team they once were because their team relies so heavily on one player. It will be truly sad to see him go to State Farm to film another commercial for the football season, but if you are good at something, or one thing, you have to stick to it.
Posted in Art, Fake News, Hilarious, Life, Politics, satire, theory, thought, Uncategorized, video
Tagged Aaron Rodgers, Cheeseheads, Commerical, Concept, Football, Green Bay, Green Bay Packers, Insurance, Language, narrative, NFC North, NFL, Packers, State Farm, Superbowl, Trade, Wisconsin